There it is...

Hello and hello and hello.

I am returned.

I know, who the fuck cares right?

It has been an unusual couple of months. First I get hit by just about the worst gout attack in 2 years. Past sins come back to haunt me I guess. I've hurt a lot of people this last year. Of course, by "a lot" I mean like 3. I do not like to hurt others. It really ends up hurting me more.

Fuck it. Nevermind.

I have discovered that I am becoming more and more disconnected from my core self. Like a balloon half tethered. seconds from floating away into the nothing. Loving everyone, and hating myself or vcice versa...the lines become blurred. I don't know anymore.

I do know one thing, I am quickly approaching that point... That place from which it will be neccessary to take my final leap into the rest of my life. To become like everyone else I see, dead inside. Become a number, a statistic, a planned absense of character. Or maybe I'm just being morbid.

I think I have finally broken myself of the love bug. I've tested myself a few times and I seem alright. I just do not care whether a girl is interested or not. I have my moment with them whether it be intemate or not and then life moves on. The hopeless romantic I once was is dead and buried.

End of line